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Hi blog, it has been almost 10 months since I last wrote here. It feels so free to be writing again and be able to express myself so fully to the world. To my readers, thank you for taking this time of rest with me. I have deeply needed a time to truly feel my inner emotions, connect with the Lord in unfathomable ways, and see growth in a season of loneliness. I cannot wait to share where I have been with God and where I am continuing to go, please come join this journey with me.
WOW! To begin, I have been in Cambodia for almost two weeks now. (In case you did not know, I am spending the next three months of my life in Southeast Asia!)
Since I have been here, I have took time to peacefully sit with the Lord before I started to pour my heart and feelings into words. There is so much beauty in connecting with my mind in intimate ways and it has set me on my feet to gracefully dance with the Lord. I am absorbing every ounce of change and cultural difference possible. My heart is singing new songs of exuberance and liveliness. I am planting seeds in new gardens and sowing a harvest of eternal grace and joy every single day. There are new rays of sunshine shining from my soul and radiating the most breathtaking glow of color. Simply put, the Holy Spirit is completely captivating me and using every breath in my lungs to teach me more about who He is.
I live at an orphanage where twenty-three kids reside. I hear Jesus speak this phrase over and over to me about the children here, “They are no longer orphans, they are sons and daughters of Me, they are worthy and wanted.” The children are full of light and I see so much of Him pour from them into me and it has completely changed my relationship with the Father of the Universe. I have found peace in this new place I call home. God is so present in this place, I awake every morning at 4:30am to worship God with my brothers and sisters in Christ and I fall asleep to the gentle murmur of their laughter. Living in Cambodia is hard, but relying on Jesus’ love is so easy. I remind myself how glorious and powerful He is and He endlessly shows me His faithfulness; even when I am using a squatty potty, taking a bucket shower, eating rice for each meal, sleeping on the floor, sweating through 99% humidity, tossing kids around in a circle, or slipping in orange mud. (Trust me, I actually DO love it here!)
Truly, I am experiencing the most uncomfortable situations with so much comfort. I rest in the Lord’s lap and let Him whisper the truth of who I really am over my being. I allow Jesus to wreck my heart to have a more childlike faith that He has invited us into, and I am learning so simply from the joy of the children I am surrounded by. I rely upon Him to revive my spirit and further discover my purpose in His Kingdom. Our God is so much bigger than anything we try to comprehend, I pray I continue to soak in His grace. His love is an ocean and I am just now touching the shore, I cannot wait to dive deeper and see how many more waves rock my boat.
